Relationship Wonders

A game was played on a local radio station in which couples were asked (among other questions)the name of the girlfriend/boyfriend of their spouse prior to them dating. I found it interesting that some knew the answer and the others said that they did not care so they had never asked. Should you know about the past relationship of the person you are dating?

I believe that a person's history is extremely important to their success in future relationships. You can learn many things by their retelling and reflections of the previous experience. I especially like to ask, "Do you believe that you could have done anything differently if you had to do it all over again?" If the relationship was a failure and the response is, "No" or "I don't know," he probably has not spent time processing the relationship . Why is this bad? Unresolved issues may have a tendency to creep into any future relationship and the person will continue to make the same mistakes over and over again. (Note: There are rare occasions when there is really nothing that could have been done because the other party was so toxic)

If the person refuses to address the previous relationship, he or she may be carrying around pain from the past. This person is a time bomb waiting to explode so if you do not want to suffer with them, exit stage left. Don't be a test dummy! It is truthfully not very wise. Getting to know someone involves asking the right questions, observing key behaviors, and preceding with caution.

What do you believe? Should you know about a person's previous relationship(s)?